Top 10 Annoying Angel Friends

Charlie's Angels was never really a program that paid close attention to character, backstory or continuity. It just wasn’t that kind of show. They kept it simple: Sabrina was the smart practical leader who had a father and ex-hubby, Jill was the athletic free spirit who (eventually) we learn has a sister and Kelly is a street smart yet sensitive orphan who became less of the former and more of the latter as the years went on (to the point where in Season 5 she was asking other Angels to pick locks for her. Ugg. But I digress. ) The point is the vast majority of Angel backstory was actually in the character bible written prior to the pilot but never really shown onscreen so the producers and writers kind of made the rest up as they went along. As old Angels left and new ones replaced them, things didn’t get any better. If anything the newer Angels got even less attention paid to their lives outside of The Townsend Agency. So it was always a treat when the show decided to reveal any information at all about an Angel’s personal life including the fact that these women did have friends outside of each other.

BACKGROUND CHECK

Townsend Agency original article by Greg November 12, 2016

The vast majority of Angel friends who did appear were from the Angel’s past (Sally, Sharon) and the friends introduced never really seemed like women the Angels would hang out with (nothing about Angela screams "Sabrina") but their mere presence at least suggested our heroines were also real people with real lives, not just superheroes on call with all their time dedicated to a the needs of their unseen male boss. So it’s sort of sad then that the vast majority of Angel friends were so forgettable. In fact, not only were most Angel friends forgettable - most were pretty annoying.

And why would the Angels hang out with such annoying useless human beings? Well there are probably a lot of reasons both in show and in production that would explain the annoying Angel friend phenomena. For one thing the show was about 3 beautiful ultra-capable likeable alpha women, so any guest star of the female variety should never intrude too closely on that territory. While Angel family members were allowed to be somewhat competent and likeable (they shared Angel DNA so they HAD to be) their friends were never allowed to outshine or compete with them. They were simply there to give the detectives a case with a personal touch.  This led the writers to tend to write the Angels' friends as victims, and worse, helpless and useless victims.

Typically the Angel friend or relative serves as a plot device who is there to either be the source of the mystery, or victim in the case by either haplessly being in the wrong place at the wrong time (Sandcastle Murders, Angel Flight) or having a love interest who is the bad guy (Angels at the Altar, Of Ghosts and Angels). The other type was usually a young orphan/troubled youth type character that an Angel takes on as a pet project (To Kill an Angel, Mother Angel). Although through dialogue we learn that these relationships pre-date said Angels' jobs at The Townsend Agency, these young charges that the Angels apparently care enough about to spend a bunch of time with and help on their own dime are curiously  unknown to Charlie, Boz, and the other girls.

Whatever the motivation for them being present, the Angel’s friends rarely seemed competent or likeable and never appeared or were mentioned again after their singular appearance. Here are the 10  most annoying, from most likeable to least!

*I’m calling Sex and The City’s Kim Cattrall and Halloween's Jamie Lee Curtis by their real names because their character’s names are so un-important. It’s freaking Jamie Lee Curtis on Charlie's Angels!

charlies-angels-friends-jamie-lee-curtis#10 Jamie Lee Curtis

Plays: Linda Frye Whose Buddy?: Kris Appears In: Winning is For Losers Annoyance Classification: None. She’s actually not very annoying I just wanted her on this list.

This is actually the second list the character Jamie Lee Curtis plays in Winning Is For Losers appears on. Check out Kris' and her “friendship” in our gayest characters article here! Jamie Lee’s Linda Frye was an old college friend of Kris who became a improbably heterosexual female golf pro. Sorry. I myself am gay so by law that previous sentence can NOT offend thee! Anyway like all female professional athletes appearing on this show someone is trying to kill/scare her out of the tournament and it's up to Kris and the Angels to save our Scream Queen for ending up in a hole in one. (Insert female golfer lesbian joke here.) This culminates into a fight to the death between Kris and some alligators that has to be seen to believed.

charlies-angels-friends-scott-colomby#9: Tommy Anders

Played By: Scott Colomby Appears in: Angel Baby Annoyance Classification: Pet Project

Baby daddy Tommy Anders really meant well when he popped up in Angel Baby trying to rescue his baby mamma and unborn child from a black market baby selling ring. Kelly knew Tommy from back in the day when she was on the force? The credits indicate she was a crossing guard. The same job I held in the 5th grade. But somehow Kelly came into this young man's life and gave him a second chance and helped him turn his life around in a way that only recent police academy crossing guards can. As I said, Tommy meant well but was pretty ineffectual in his efforts to rescue his unborn child and baby mamma. He got arrested then released then immediately captured by the bad guys only to be rescued by Sabrina Kris and Boz. Don’t know why the show bothered to mention he was a boxer when all he did was get knocked the hell out!

Drama He Brought: Because of Kelly’s friendship with Tommy, Kris had to have pretend sex, Kelly had to get pretend pregnant and Sabrina had to smoke a real cigarette. Oh and Kris had to shoot someone out the window and get her hair sniffed by Sabrina.

charlies-angels-friends-robin-mattson#8 Erica Burke

Played by: Robin Mattson Whose Buddy?: Tiffany Appears In : Of Ghosts and Angels Annoyance Classification: Married Murder

Erica is Tiffany’s college friend who has recently married a man Tiffany has not met, so of course new hubby will end up trying to kill all involved. It’s just the way things work out in the Angelverse. Erica is pretty typical as Angel friends go in other ways too. Weepy, scared yet not scared or smart enough to remove herself from the source of terror. Kind of willing to ride the horror out in hopes an Angel will swoop in and save the day. In Erica’s case it’s even more annoying that she didn’t just leave since her protagonist were two fold in she married a man who had a history of killing his new wives AND she had to contend with said husbands dead ex’s ghost. That’s a whole lot of good reasons to up and leave the spooky castle you are currently residing in. White folks. Whatareyagonnado?

Drama She Brought: Because of Tiffany’s friendship with Erica – Tiffany will be forever cursed with unwanted psychic visions and also burdened with the guilt of killing her first bad guy, Also Erica’s presence resulted in poltergeist activity levitating Bosley’s desk and probably disorganizing/damaging files and office supplies.

charlies-angels-friends-olivia-barash#7 Samantha

Played by: Olivia Barash Who’s Buddy?: Jill Appears In: Mother Angel Annoyance Classification: Pet Project

Jill plays the Mother in Mother Angel and Samantha is her surrogate child. It seems that the precocious and nosy Sam has happened upon a murder committed by one of her Aunt Charlotte’s ex-lovers and since Jill once worked (solo?) on a stolen jewelry case for Sam’s Aunt, this somehow becomes our ex-Angel's problem. Much of Samantha’s annoying tendencies can be forgiven due to her age. She also had to grow up real fast and the lack of structure and stability in her life is probably the main cause of her incorrigible nature. She talks to adults in way that makes one want to back hand the crap at of her, yet at the same time she acts brave and resourceful by helping Jill and herself escape the bad guys boat by picking a lock.

Drama she brought: Because of Jill’s friendship with Sam, Kris was left homeless and excluded from the slumber party-home invasion and there was another wicker fight at the beach house!

charlies-angels-friends-kim-cattrall-min#6 Kim Cattrall

Played: Shannon? Sharon? Who cares? It’s Kim Cattrall. Whose Buddy?: Kelly Appeared in: Angels At The Altar Annoyance Classification: Marrying Murder

Another one of Kelly’s friends is marrying murder and this time literally, as in Kelly and Tiffany are actually in the freaking wedding. This time the hapless victim is played by none other than Kim Cattrall - that’s Samantha from Sex in the City if you are 35 and The Mannequin from the film Mannequin if you are 45.

Kim Cattrall’s character wasn’t even all that annoying in her singular appearance on Charlie's Angels. Sure she was getting married to an obviously shady character, and sure people kept shooting at her and trying to kill her as the wedding day loomed, yet she was too dumb to just cancel the wedding, yet compared to  Kelly’s other friend Sally, Kim Cattrall wasn’t so bad. Maybe she seems more annoying than she is because she appeared in an episode where a bunch of annoying things happened (Kris gets owned in a fight by some random chick with a blanket, Tiffany has poofy hair and gets tipped over in a fight).

Drama she bought: Because of Kelly’s friendship with Erica, Kelly was almost run over, Kris was wrapped in a blanket and stuffed in a closet and Tiffany was tipped over!

charlies-angels-friends-melody-scott-thomas#5 Betsy

Played By: Melody Thomas Scott Whose Buddy? Kris Appeared In: The Sandcastle Murders Annoyance Classification: Pet Project

If you are like me and live for The Young and The Restless then you know that Kris' little beach friend/neighbor is played by Melody Scott Thomas, who has played boozy matriarch Nikki Newman on the seminal soap for about 217 years now. She didn’t have a lot of screen time in her one Angel appearance. Just enough to show up cry and whine like she is scared and go out of her way NOT to tell Kris what it is that is actually scaring her, only to be promptly murdered and buried under a sandcastle. Ashley Abbot laughs. Anyway there's nothing more annoying than an Angel friend who could have with just 3 or 4 comprehensible words saved her own life by just telling Kris what was wrong. We only had to endure her nonsense for like 5 mins, so no harm no foul. Think how poor Sharon Newman feels? She has had to put up with a mother in law like Nikki for like 20 years! Oh and just because I can: Nikki Newman’s onscreen hubby of 30 years Victor Newman King of Young and The restless also appeared on a classic Charlie's Angels episode, Season 5’s Attack Angels. He is responsible for the first and only Angel fight!

Drama she brought: Because of Kris' friendship with Betsy, she was home-invaded and forced into her first wicker-fight. Also Betsy’s annoying presence caused Kris to be late for work, Bosley to shoot someone off the pier requiring Sabrina to rescue him and everyone had to ride a merry-go-round and act like it’s a fun thing to do. Thanks Betsy!

charlies-angels-friends-patti-darbanville#4 Bianca

Played By: Patti D’Arbanville Whose Buddy?: Julie Appears In: Angels of the Deep Annoyance Classification: Half Pet project/ half hapless victim

I’m still after all these years not sure what Bianca’s exact role was in this episode. A weed go-between? Was she in on it from the beginning? Was she in the right place at the right time? The show seemed to suggest she was an opportunist yet at the same time conning everyone so I’m still not sure. Whatever her role, she was annoying as hell. A free spirit in the worst sense of the term.  Sneaky, deceptive, sociopathic - just the sort of person Julie does NOT need to bring home to her new co-workers the moment they arrive in Hawaii and start working together. Way to show good judgement to your brand new employer/friends, Julie.

Drama She bought: Because of her friendship with Bianca, Julie had to almost die scuba diving (twice), kick a bad guy in the shins and waste a bunch of perfectly good weed. Now you know that could not have sat well with the former street “model”.  Bianca’s presence also caused Kris to almost get blown up scuba-diving and caused Kelly to empty all the contents of her purse so she could beat a bad guy with it.

charlies-angels-friends-tracy-brooks-swope#3 Sally

Played By: Tracy Brooks Swope Who’s Buddy?: Kelly Appears In: Angels Belong In Heaven Annoyance Classification: Marrying Murder

Sally is another improbable Kelly friend who, like Kim Cattrall, is allegedly a high school/college friend/sorority type sister even though it was established early on that Kelly was raised in a religious orphanage, but whatever. Sally’s biggest personality trait is acting confused. If you google "hapless" Sally’s social security number comes up. I am not at all surprised that Sally fell for a sleazeball con-man who was somehow related to an old case of Kelly’s. That’s sooo her to fall for someone like that. Sabrina seemed instantly annoyed by Sally’s mere existence. I concur.

Drama She Brings: Because of Sally, Kelly got home invaded and pushed down dramatically on her couch resulting in her having to shoot the bad guy out of her front window. I’m sure her homeowners association feels some kind of way about that.

charlies-angels-friends-dennis-dimster#2 Skip

Played By: Dennis Dimster Whose Buddy?: Kelly Appears In: To Kill An Angel Annoyance Classification: Pet Project

Skip is the only Angel friend to shoot an Angel in the head, yet he is still not the most annoying Angel friend because Angela exists. That being said, if ever there was a case for corporal punishment Skip would be the example. Yeah sure his mom abandoned him when he was younger, but lots of kids get abandoned by their parents and don’t shoot former Breck girls in the head while they're holding cotton candy. She paid your way in and bought you stuff you, ungrateful brat. No wonder your mom left your ass in a shopping center. Attention Kmart shoppers, psycho aisle 3!

Drama He Bought: Because of Kelly’s friendship with Skip, Kelly got shot in the head and totally wasted the money she spent on the cotton candy when the delicious treat joined her on the pavement. Oh because of Skip's shenanigans, Sabrina snapped at Jill and cried. Sabrina NEVER snaps at Jill.

charlies-angels-friends-fawne-harriman#1 Angela

Played By: Fawne Harriman Whose Buddy?: Sabrina’s college “friend” Appeared in: Angel Flight Annoyance Classification: Yes.

Angela was the most annoying Angel friend ever. Period! And I put an exclamation point after the period so you know I’m not playing. She was more annoying than Kelly’s friend Skip and he shot Kelly in the freaking head at point blank range. Every moment Angela was on screen was annoying for viewers, but actually dangerous for both Angels and flight attendant trainees as her idiotic actions put a plane load of people in jeopardy. In the space of 60 minutes (48 if you account for commercials) Angela managed to: sabotage a telephone sting because she couldn’t manage to push a button, allow herself to be manipulated into helping the bad guy, accidentally hijack a plane, and allow herself to get knocked out by being pushed lightly into a closed door. Oh and she managed all these feats while being weepy and whiny. And Angela is the guest star victim with whom the audience is supposed to be sympathetic. Made me want to track down Skip and have him shoot Angela in the head.