The Jade Trap
A handsome young gigolo, Denny Railsback, and his 50-something skull-faced sugar mama quarrel in the Seawave Hotel lobby, finally retiring to their room for a drink. They’re unaware that a cat burglar (Ted Machlin) has rappelled down the side of the hotel, entered their window, and at this moment, is cleaning out the safe in their adjoining room. Denny wants to buy a boat. Skull lady wants none of it. She’s bored and decides to cut off their relationship – and his line of credit. He shoots her. Cat burglar overhears the exchange and knocks over a lamp, startling Denny, who dashes into the next room. The two men lock eyes for an instant before fleeing their separate ways.
Joan Leslie of Sergeant York is the manager of the Seawave and hires the Angels to find out who is burgling and murdering at the hotel. Charlie decides the Angels will go undercover as various guests of the hotel, though they would be far less conspicuous by simply maintaining their actual identities.
Kelly checks in as Kelly Devereaux, an elegant southern belle who becomes romantically involved with the cat burglar (though she doesn’t yet know). Kris masquerades as Swedish actress Anikka Bjornbar. Recently widowed, heavily accented, and in need of funds for her lavish lifestyle, she’s reluctantly auctioning her late husband’s jade collection – news she doesn’t allow anyone in the hotel lobby to miss.
Playing herself, Sabrina dons her trademark suspicious black turtleneck-burglar-mime outfit to snoop around the rooftop of the hotel with Bosley. A lurking Denny follows, and with one crack of his balsawood 2×4, knocks Bosley cold while Sabrina is literally left hanging over the commercial. When Danny severs her rope, she somehow falls into the balcony of an unattractive couple, proceeding to make her escape by speaking in an irritating staccato and backing her way out of the room.
Bri discovers that the iced dowager was found wearing a diamond bracelet, and thus deduces that the killer’s motive was not one of theft. After an office huddle, it’s determined that there was a killer and a burglar. (How do they get this??)
Ted finds Kelly lunching solo in the hotel’s restaurant, and charmingly asks her to dinner. She seductively and Southernly accepts.
Meanwhile, Miss Bjornbar strikes up a conversation with Ted’s gossipy elder-mom (who’s in on the robberies, but Kris doesn’t know) and spills the beans about the value of her jade collection. Next, she visits the nearby marina to hire a sailing lesson from Denny, who doesn’t seem to be remotely attracted despite her loneliness, hotness, and short-shorts. Afterwards, Denny appears visibly shocked to see Ted and Kelly crossing the street together. Kris notes this.
Kelly and Ted stroll along the marina as she feeds him lies to impress him with her supposed inherited wealth. They kiss, and then are driven at by a crazed Denny at the wheel of a stolen vehicle. He gives up easily, and no one is hurt. Kelly evidently is actually falling for Ted and is disappointed when it’s later reasoned that he’s the most likely suspect for the burglaries. (Surprise!)
Bosley tails Ted’s mom to a gas station and witnesses her entering the restroom as one old lady, but exiting dressed as a slightly dissimilar old lady. She then drives to the poorly guarded Swan Security Systems, where as a former employee, she is somehow able to get access to any number of security codes used to crack safes.
Ted somehow researches Kelly’s background and finds she’s lying – so she’s now Kelly King, an antique buyer visiting for the jade auction. She drops bait about the upcoming unarmed transfer of the collection to attract Ted’s interest. The jade is – in actuality – Charlie’s, and the auction is supposed to be rigged for Kelly to win, but Bosley (the auctioneer) goes hog-wild and accidentally sells it to some millionaire lady.
The team nabs Ted as he walks right into their trap and attempts to steal the jade. They then conference in their hotel room with the cooperative mother and son. Ted explains that the police never would have believed he wasn’t the murderer and agrees to help them catch Denny.
Sexy Annika asks Denny to her hotel room for “lunch”, but he walks into a staged burglary starring Ted. Denny holds both Ted and Kris at gunpoint and confesses to the murder, then shoots them both – with blanks. Bosley, Kelly and Sabrina appear from the other room with a tape recorder, still running. Denny dives out the window and takes off towards the marina with Kelly and Kris in hot pursuit. Just as he’s about to set sail for freedom, Sabrina pops out from his boat and topples him into the water.
Back at the hotel, the mom is gently arrested. Kelly reveals her real last name to Ted (so what?) and he apologizes for the way things worked out between them. However the problem of Charlie’s auctioned jade collection remains! “Oh, Bosley!”
Dig that disco chase music! Most of this episode’s action involved sprinting around– Kelly and Ted dodging Denny’s ineffectual attempts to run them down on the beach, and then Kelly and Kris chasing Denny to his boat. Even though it’s a no-frills foot chase, it’s memorable for some reason.
Though “Accents” commentary usually means a thumbs-down, Cheryl Ladd’s personal contribution of a very tongue-in-cheek Swedish(ish) accent was actually an episode highlight, which may confound real Swedes but entertains everyone else. Kelly’s Southern schtick is always fun, even if second banana this time, although she did get to perform the series’ only double fake Angel accent – imitating Swedish Kris through her own Southern drawl – “Taaank yu?”
Charlie derails yet another office meeting to ask the Angels if his English maid will think he’s too vulgar if he dunks his crumpet in his tea. The maid looks on with brainless approval opposite his desk. What’s with Charlie’s constant need to make the Angels aware that he’s entertaining a bimbo while talking to them? Are they supposed to want to high-five him or something?
Case solved in approximately 4 days
Day 1 – Case introduced – Sabrina rappelling
Day 2 – Ice bag on Bosley’s head – Kelly & Ted driven at
Day 3 – Discussion in hotel room – Angels trap Ted
Day 4 – Kris invites Denny for lunch – takedown
The pastel plague afflicting the Angels here also claims the life of the following episode (Angels onthe Run). Sabrina and Kris sport almost identical horrid ensembles of a) head-to-toe, bland mauve, and b) head-to-toe bland peach. Kris saves the wardrobe-day with a simple and classy black dress fringed in white.
Sabrina’s wearing her trusty burglin’ outfit seen in and . Her hotel keycard-looking necklace thing makes a comeback next year in and .
Kris gets to scream something that is NOT the canned scream. Finally! Thank you!
But we’re happy to report the episode isn’t a complete bust: you can savor the stock grunt emitted by the man Kelly and Kris knock into while chasing their prey, then Denny moments later when he falls into the water.
• Ted asked Kelly out to dinner and a swim, but (thankfully) it didn’t look much like they intended to honor the swimming part. Hopefully he wasn’t planning on diving into that stagnant-looking water where they were strolling.
• The shots of Sabrina looking down at the street while rappelling at night are in daytime.
• When Denny starts trying to cut the rope with his pocket knife, Sabrina acts like she can feel the rope moving, even though she couldn’t possibly. And why would she fall into the balcony, rather than straight down to her death?
• Kris’s hair knows no continuity. Straight for the sailin’ lesson, curly in the car with Denny. Straight at the marina again, curly in the hotel room. Sea air?
• If the auction was a setup and the jade was Charlie’s, why couldn’t Kelly just keep bidding up to a zillion dollars?
• When it was time to trap Ted, Sabrina followed him on the roof and then came down his rope after him. Note that when she drops into the window and draws her gun, she’s wearing A) giant gloves she wasn’t wearing a second ago and B) no rapelling harness. How’d she manage that?
• How could Denny dive out the window when fleeing from the Angels, considering both the burglar and Sabrina needed hundreds of feet of rope to scale down the side of the building?
• How did Sabrina get to that boat before everyone else considering she went out the same window after Denny? The “What took you so long” gag is less cute when it’s a physical impossibility.
Dirk Benedict (Denny) previously played Barton in .
Jack Kosslyn (the clerk) plays a man named Harrison in .
Lee Sheldon also wrote , , , , and .
George McCowan also directed , , , , , , , and .
|Shots fired by Angels:||0|
|Shots fired at Angels:||0|
|Criminal Charges:||Bid rigging conspiracy (Bosley and Kelly)|
TOWNSEND AGENCY COMMENTARY
I yust love the fact that if you visit , you can literally retrace the Angels’ steps throughout this classic episode. Well, aside from rapelling down the side of the Seawave – the management doesn’t take kindly to that. It was a given that we’d be bumping into the southern belle, and that poor old Bos would get knocked unconscious by the bad guy, but the plot here is really quite good. You know that if you can quote it, you’ve got a gem on your hands. Er, jade.
This is easily one of my favorite episodes. I love the setting ( The Seawave is one of my favorite filming locations because, if you ever visit, it really looks and feels like the show) and I love the tone. Rapelling jewel theivery, fake accents, ill-fated romance with a dash of comedy (intentional or not) throughout – it’s got everything. This is the episode I think of when I think Charlie’s Angels.
I cannot name one other person on earth who could do this Yade accent without it being annoying. Sabrina’s just so Sabrina. Let her get in a black turtleneck and refuse to participate in a cover, and she’ll have your case solved in 20 minutes.
A gigolo shoots his sugar mama point blank while she is being robbed by another man with no connection to the killer. The burglar is blamed for the murders and it’s up to the Angels to solve the case. The burglar is so sweet I find myself rooting for him and his mom is a hoot. Kris plays the part of a Swedish actress and gets her shot at pulling off an accent that only she could and make cute. Kelly gets involved with the burglar and is disappointed when she finds out he is a crook. I hope the burglar’s mom didn’t get too much time. This is a season 2 favorite for me. ” I just love my yade!”
This one is pure entertainment with a solid plot. Kris “Anneke Björnbar” – the famous swedish actress that nobody knows – hams her way through the episode with a delightfully cheesy accent. Cat-burgling Sabrina and her attraction for the honeysuckle is a comic highlight. As is “Old Silver Tongue” Bosley as the auctioneer falling prey to bidding fever – auction mayhem ensues! Oh, and Charlie is as tacky as ever (dunkin’ the crumpet, really?). Conclusio: TANK YU for this ep TPTB.